
Buyisela kwakhona Amandla Akho: Ezona Ncwadi ziBalaseleyo ngokuXhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo
Ukuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo kunokuchazwa njengemeko yokuzithoba ngokugqithiseleyo kwiqabane lomntu elithandanayo ngenxa yesidingo esiqatha sokugcina ubudlelwane beemvakalelo kunye nothando luphila. Esi sibini siguquguqukayo sibonisa ukuzithemba okuphantsi kwicala lomntu obonisa indlela yokuziphatha, kunye nokuba nokwenzeka kokuzenzakalisa okanye ukwenzakalise abanye.
nayo, Lo mcimbi unokuzibonakalisa kuthotho lweendlela zokuziphatha ezibonisa umlutha kunye nokunyanzeliswa., ebonisa i-asymmetry yeendima apho elinye lamaqela linamandla angenakulinganiswa kwelinye-nangona kunokwenzeka ukuba oku kuhambelana. Ukuze siwucacise ngakumbi lo mbandela, senze uluhlu lwezona ncwadi zibalaseleyo ngokuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo.
Iincwadi ezigqwesileyo ngokuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo
Ukoyisa ukuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo: indlela yokuthintela uthando ukuba lungabi yintuthumbo (2019), nguJorge Castelló Blasco
Njengoko sichazile kumacandelo angaphambili, ukuxhomekeka ngokweemvakalelo lutyekelo apho ubomi bomntu ochaphazelekayo bujikeleza kubudlelwane babo, kwaye ezi zithatha indawo ephambili kwindalo yakhe yonke. Ngokuqhelekileyo, olu lwalamano aluvakali nje lungenampilo kwaye lungalingani, kodwa lunjalo. Oku kuthetha ukuba ubomi bothando bomntu oxhomekeke ngokweemvakalelo kukufela ukholo.
Nangona oku kusenokubonakala kuyindida, umntu ochaphazelekayo akanakuyibaleka le meko, nokuba unqwenela ngokuphindaphindiweyo. Kwincwadi yakhe, umbhali ujongana nayo yonke le miba, kwaye ibonelela ngamanyathelo esiwalandelayo ukuze sibe nobudlelwane obulungeleleneyo nobunempilo ngokweemvakalelo. Eyona nto ingcono kukuba amagama avela ku-a isazi ngengqondo esinamava ekusebenziseni lo msebenzi.
Ucatshulwa nguJorge Castelló Blasco
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"Ukuxhomekeka ngokomzwelo, ngendlela esemgangathweni, yimfuno enzulu yemvakalelo umntu omnye avakalelwa ngayo komnye kulo lonke ubudlelwane babo bothando." (Udliwano-ndlebe apha infocop.es)
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"Unyango kufuneka ngokuyintloko ibe yi-psychotherapeutic, ngakumbi kuba ezi ziingxaki zobuntu. Iinjongo eziphambili kufuneka zibe kukwandisa ukuzithemba, ukulungelelanisa imeko yeemvakalelo zomntu (nokuba uchaze ukuphela kobudlelwane, ukuba kuyimfuneko), kwaye ufune ukulungelelaniswa kweemvakalelo kubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu, ngakumbi abo baphakathi kwesibini. (Udliwano-ndlebe kwi-infocop.es)
Indlela yokuphelisa umlutha wakho emntwini (2001), nguHoward M. Halpern
Ngamanye amaxesha, nangona ubudlelwane bothando bubangela usizi ngaphezu kovuyo, Kukho abantu abangakwaziyo ukulahla ibhondi, kungekhona kwanabo, bazikhohlisa ngamabinzana anjengokuthi "Ewe, uyandithanda, akazi nje ukuba angabonisa njani." Ukuba kunjalo, kuyacaca ukuba izifundo ekuthethwa ngazo zikhotyokiswa ngumntu ongasoze abenze bonwabe.
Umbhali owayephikisana uHoward M. Halpern, ugqirha wengqondo owazi kakuhle le miba, wabhala. Isikhokelo senyathelo nenyathelo esijolise ekuncedeni abafundi ukuba bahlukane nokulutha kwaye basinde ekwahlukaneni. Umthamo uquka inqwaba yobungqina bekliniki obujongene nezi zihloko: "Indlela yokuqonda iimpawu zoBudlelwane obunobungozi" kwaye "Indlela yokulwa namaqhinga oMlingane Wakho aSebenzisa ukuKubamba."
Ucatshulwa nguHoward M. Halpern
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«Ukuhlala kulwalamano oluyingozi kunokuba yintlekele yobuqu eqhubekayo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, isizathu sokuba abantu bangafumani ubudlelwane obanelisayo kukuba abakwazi ukushiya ubudlelwane obunganelisiyo kwaye baqhubele phambili.
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"Ndithetha nabo bantu bazifumana bephambili, ubudlelwane obunobungozi, njengesithandwa okanye iqabane. Imigaqo endiyiphuhlisayo inokusetyenziswa ngokulinganayo nabahlobo, intsapho, abasebenzi, imisebenzi, njl. "
Uyathanda okanye uxhomekeke? (2010), nguWalter Riso
UWalter Riso akayonye yeengcali zengqondo ezidumileyo kumaxesha amva nje, kodwa ukwangomnye wezona zithethi zicikozayo kunye nonxibelelwano ngomsebenzi wakhe. Ngokutsho kwakhe, Ukuzinikela ngokweemvakalelo akuthethi ukulahlekelwa nguwe kwenye, kodwa kunoko wongezelele omnye umntu ekukhuleni apho bobabini baya kuba nombulelo kolo manyano. Uthando olusempilweni sisimbuku sesibini, hayi ukuthabatha apho wonke umntu elahlekelwa.
Inkcubeko ethandwayo yakudala yasishiya siqinisekile ukuba umntu akanakuthanda ukuzimela. Ngethamsanqa, ezo ncoko zakudala ziphangisiwe ukuze zisivumele ukuba sibone indlela enobubele yokunxibelelana nabantu esibathandayo: ngenkululeko, ukuthanda komntu ngamnye kunye nokwabelwana ngako, kunye nokuthembana. Kwincwadi yakhe, UWalter Riso uthetha ngendlela yokuphelisa ubudlelwane bezengqondo ukugcina umlilo wothando uphila.
UWalter Riso ucaphula
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"Xa uthando lunkqonkqoza emnyango, luya kungena njengesaqhwithi: awuyi kukwazi ukuvala okubi kwaye ufumane okulungileyo kuphela. Ukuba ucinga ukuba uthando lulingana nolonwabo, wehla ngendlela engafanelekanga.
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«I-paradox yobuxoki: i-idiot eyonwabileyo okanye indoda elumkileyo engonwabanga isonjululwe. Kukho ukhetho lwesithathu, olungcono: indoda elumkileyo enoyolo, nokuba ininzi, kuba akukho bulumko ngaphandle kovuyo.
Abasetyhini abathanda kakhulu (2019), nguRobin Norwood
Ngale ncwadi, Umbhali unikezela ngeendlela ezizezinye kubafazi abathanda kakhulu ukuba bafunde ukulubhekisa kubo olo thando., ukuze kwakhiwe ubudlelwane obunempilo nobonwabileyo kwixesha elizayo. Ukusukela ekupapashweni kwayo, le ncwadi iye yaphula iirekhodi zokuthengisa, yaba sisikhokelo sokuhamba kwabasetyhini abaninzi kunye nokubonelela ngekhosi ecacileyo malunga nokuphula iipateni eziyingozi.
“Xa uninzi lweencoko zethu nabahlobo abasenyongweni zithetha ngaye—iingxaki, iingcamango, izenzo, neemvakalelo zakhe—xa phantse zonke izivakalisi zethu ziqala ngokuthi ‘yena...’, sithandana kakhulu,” utshilo umbhali. Kuluhlu lwakhe lwezengqondo, UNorwood sele ecebisa abasetyhini iminyaka engaphezu kwamashumi amathathu, ngenxa yezizathu ezingalunganga, kunye nomfana ongalunganga.
Robin Norwood Quotes
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"Ukwamkelwa ngokwenene komntu njengoko enjalo, ngaphandle kokuzama ukuwatshintsha ngokukhuthaza, ukunyanzeliswa, okanye ukunyanzeliswa, yindlela ephakamileyo kakhulu yothando, kwaye kunzima kakhulu ukuba uninzi lwethu luqhube."
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"Sonke sivame ukukholelwa ukuba ukubandezeleka luphawu lothando lokwenene, ukuba ukwala ukubandezeleka kukuzingca, kwaye ukuba umntu unengxaki, umfazi kufuneka amncede atshintshe."
Xa ukuthanda kakhulu kuxhomekeke (2018), nguSilvia Congost
Le ncwadi yenzelwe nabani na oziva evaleleke kubudlelwane obungamonwabisiyo, ophulukene nolawulo lobomi bakhe, kwaye ekufuneka, ngoku kunanini na ngaphambili, azi indlela yokuzinceda. Kuyabonakala ukuba Kubudlelwane bothando akukho ziqinisekiso, kodwa kukho abo babanjwe kula ma-dynamics athi, ekugqibeleni, avelise intlungu kunye nokungahambi kakuhle kumacala omabini.
Kumaxesha amaninzi, Abo baxhomekeke ngokweemvakalelo banembono ephosakeleyo ngothando, ekholelwa ukuba uthando lufana nokubandezeleka. Ngale ndlela, eyona ndlela ingcono yokuzikhwebula kwezi ngcinga kukumamela, ukufunda, kwaye ekugqibeleni ufune unyango lobuchwephesha kubantu abafana noCongost, isazi ngesayikholojisti esinamava eminyaka kuqeqesho lwezonyango olugxile ekuxhomekekeni ngokweemvakalelo.
Ucatshulwa nguSilvia Congost
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"Xa umntu eqinisa ukuzithemba kwabo ukuba bazikhumbuze ukuba banamandla kwaye banako, ukuba bafanelwe ukonwaba kwaye bazive benoxolo, kwaye baqala ukuzinikela ngokwenene kwinto abayifunayo ngokunyanisekileyo, kulapho bafumana inkululeko yokwenene."
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"Akukho ubudlelwane obungaphumeleliyo, kukho ubudlelwane obuphela, njengayo yonke into ebomini. Abanye bahlala ixesha elide kwaye abanye bancinci, kwaye bonke basifundisa izinto kwaye sifunda kuzo zonke.
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“Yiba nesibindi sokuba sengozini kunye nabo ubathembileyo. Oku kuya kukuvumela ukuba unyaniseke ngakumbi kwaye ube nenyaniso, womeleze amaqhina akho, kwaye uqinise ubuhlobo bakho.
Uxhomekeke kuthando (2013), ngu-Amparo kunye no-Emilia Serra Salcedo
Le yincwadi ephonononga ubudlelwane bothando ngokwembono yabo baxhomekeke kakhulu ngokweemvakalelo. Ngokusebenzisa indlela enamava ngakumbi, Ababhali baphonononga ukuba la makhonkco anokukhula njani, iindlela zokuziphatha ezizigcinayo kunye neziphumo ezivezwa kubomi babo bahlangabezana nazo.
Umsebenzi udibanisa ithiyori yezengqondo kunye nemizekelo yokwenyani, eyenza abafundi abanokubanakho ukuchonga iimpawu ezilumkisayo kubudlelwane babo beemvakalelo. Ababhali ababhinqileyo nabo zibonelela ngezixhobo zokukhuthaza ubudlelwane obunempilo nobulungeleleneyo. Zikwasikhuthaza ukuba sicinge ngendlela esithetha ngayo nabanye.
Ukukhupha ngaphandle kwe-anesthesia: indlela yokomeleza ukuzimela ngokweemvakalelo (2015), nguWalter Riso
Le yincwadi esisiseko yokuqonda ukuba uncamathiselo lusebenza njani kubantu abadala kunye nokuba yintoni ebangela oko. Ngaxeshanye, Umbhali usinika izitshixo zokoyisa le meko kwaye singaweli kuyo kwakhona., ngaphezu kokubonelela umfundi ngezibonelelo eziyimfuneko ukuze agcine umdla wabo ngamnye kunye nomnqweno wokuqhuba iiprojekthi zabo, ngaphandle kokuxhomekeka kwiqabane labo ukuba bafezekise.
Eyona nto ingcono kakhulu malunga neRiso, phantse rhoqo, ukuba usebenza ngemizekelo yokwenyani evela kwimisebenzi yakhe yeklinikhi, kwaye oku kuvumela abafundi ukuba baqonde ngokucacileyo zonke iireferensi zombhali, oye waba yingcali ekuchazeni-njengomfundisi-zonke iingozi zokunamathisela kunye neendlela ezifanelekileyo zokujongana nayo. Kule ncwadi, Isazi ngengqondo siyamema ukuba sikhusele ukuzimela ngokweemvakalelo.